The BeltzBib: This Is Why You’re Fat [Novelties]

For only any easy payment of $13.95, you can own the latest innovation in car dining technology, the BeltzBib! It attaches to your seat band, it’s a bib and you’re a sloppy fatso!

The BeltzBib. We never thought we’d see a joint concern place of traffic a seat strip mounted bib designed to clinch and protect against fast food droppings. Truly we are in the of great value age of being obese in America. Look upon this invention with disgust and mock any who would corrupt it. Complete sales pitch below:

BeltzBib™ is designed to save clothing from stains and spills while you or your passengers are eating in your vehicle. Simply attach BeltzBib™ to your vehicle’s shoulder harness; place your food in the pouch of BeltzBib™ and continue your proceed without worrying about stains and spills. When you are finished eating, remove BeltzBib™ from the protuberance harness, roll BeltzBib™ up and secure it through the attached Velcro fitting. Place BeltzBib™ under your vehicle seat for the remainder of your journey. When you arrive at your destination, unroll BeltzBib™, remove any victuals particles or wrappers, place BeltzBib™ in your washing machine or handwash it. Dry BeltzBib™ and then you are ready to resuse it again.

Get one for the kids, too!

Yes, rush out and buy one for the kids too, because being a sloppy sound food eater is something that needs to be taught early. We weep for society. [Dan'session Products via